Waste of technology

Tonight I changed the wall paper on my phone

to the picture of you and me

the one where you look sad

and I’m still pretending to be happy

as we take our last trip

to the airport together

and I’m pressing my lips to this image

over and over

and I’m asking god

all the gods

to bring you back to me

so I can taste your lips

just one more time

just two more minutes of time

just bring my love back to me

and I’m screaming it in my head

and I don’t think they can hear me

I should feel like and idiot, huh?

The gods never listen

but the devil does

and he can have my soul

if he’ll just bring you back to me

and that’s foolish as well

he doesn’t need me

the walls have crumbled

and the hearts of men

have been burnt

every day in sin

and love so pure

can never win

 

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No more magic

I’m at that point of exhaustion

numb in every corner of my heart

and my mind wants to remember

everything we could have been

side by side through thick and thin

dragons playing hide and seek behind the stars

rain turning to ash as we bathe in fire

sleeping curled up like yin and yang

but you had the heart of a coward

and as the words slipped off my tongue

you planned your great escape

Houdini with the key to my heart

and in no time at all you were gone

disappearing with the rising sun

a deceiver and a thief

I’m numb and I’m cold

hiding behind a spiral galaxy

desperately trying to kill the fire

coat it up in thick layers of ice

just trying to survive the night

the numb a welcome relief

and I’m done feeling the pain

of my soul split in two

I’m done being the fool for you

I am the fierce and mighty dragon

and you?

You are the weak and brittle branch

I crunch beneath my feet.

forgotten

Dreams used to be filled

with full magical moons

and fairy tale dreams

Dreams in vivid color

and every detail

a windswept cursive sigh

but now, the moon just sits there

and doesn’t say a thing

and in my chest where hope used to burn

a big burning hole

sits an empty cave

dust motes floating on the last

lingering moonbeams

and when one landed in my open eye

a memory long forgotten

fell back into my soul

and hooked me deep

scraping along the edges

opening fissures in the dark

could time stand still for just a minute

and let me catch my breath

and could I find the desire to believe

and see the magic in the world

again as I did once before

with innocence

with hope that dragons do exist

and I felt that I was special

hiding secrets inside the layers of the earth

folded and creased up and buried under mountains

where maybe this magic is sleeping and hiding

waiting for someone to believe again

fantasies coming true

and the good guys are the bad guys

stealing hearts and kisses in the dark

where dreams are filled with all things

trust and doubt and desire and everything

in between

but then I blinked and then memory faded away

and I forgot again how to dream

and the ghost of the dream was stained

to the walls of my mind

a picture left in the background

blurry and undefined.

the moon’s unrelenting silence

words got stuck in my throat

as time whirled out of control

and the last dream died

bone wind chimes echo and mock

in the dry and dusty hollow cave

where I’m tortured with nightmares

of when you were mine.

 

 

 

 

No more Why’s

Why?  He cried as though there were an answer.

I gazed at him in silence.

There is no answer for “why” out here.

There are merely many more “why’s”.

Out here there’s so damn many,

they fill the sky.

Until we hear the call of the birds.

They echo back the unanswered question,

“Why?”

Somewhere inside and underneath,

entombed and waking slowly,

a giant beast will shake his head,

and when he grumbles the whole world will rumble,

and shake, and fall apart.

His roar will be another cry of “why?”

But there is no answer, and no reason justified,

when we all shut our mouths, close our hearts

and shut our eyes.

Slightly pissed with your ignorance

I don’t generally make it a habit to say what I feel about certain hot topics.  But the hate I’ve been seeing is ridiculous and I have to.  I shouldn’t.  I really shouldn’t.  But I’m as human as the rest of you.  Unless you’re a really cool cyborg.  That would be awesome as shit.  Cuz, ya know, Cyborg!!!

 

 

 

 

 

How fucking awful

to pay homage

to shadows left in concrete

lives vaporized

left incomplete

innocent children

melting and running

agonized and burnt

confused and hurt

to bereave and mourn

and have the balls to say

“I’m sorry”

from all of us

to all of you

To once and for all

not make it about me

or you or any of them

but all of us

and how it shaped and formed

life as we know it

on this tiny blue

earth.

So for fuck’s sake

have a fucking fit about

how selfish we’ve always been.

When we should be holding hands

we’re still spitting and hurling

insults and injuries

about WARS that don’t make sense.

Where are we now

and how much closer could we be

without this ego

this pride

this damage we have caused?

This rift and tear

where humanity has died

and no one wins

on either side.

I’m sorry too

and if you’re not

I say fuck you.

 

 

I apologize if this offends.  Actually I don’t.  I feel bad for them all.  Not just one or the other.  I read The Butter Battle Book by Dr. Seuss.  Amazing book.  Taught me all I ever wanted to know about war.  The older I get, the better I get at looking at things from different angles.  At least I hope I’m getting better.  With knowledge at our very fingertips, I feel it’s important to find compassion and learn to forgive, this life is entirely too short.